Belated NYE Special: If Calibers Were Famous? NSFW/NSFL

2016 may always be remembered for its abundance of controversial news including the death of many beloved celebrities.  In this trigger-filled episode of TFBTV, James wonders aloud: What would different calibers be if they were celebrities, films, politicians, or other famous people and publications? Who would 9mm be? What movie is most like .357SIG? What’s 9mm Makarov anymore? James sends off 2016 with this truly awful video.

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Transcript ….
[coming soon]

Patrick R

Patrick is a Senior Writer for The Firearm Blog and Co-Director for TFBTV. He is a verified gun nerd and also podcasts at The Firearms Podcast. With a lifelong passion for shooting, he has a love for all types of firearms, especially overly modified plastic handguns, precision rifles, and AR based things. You can follow Patrick on Instagram @tfbpatrick, Facebook, or contact him by email at

The above post is my opinion and does not reflect the views of any company or organization.


  • James Reeves


  • bull


  • Joseph Goins

    7.62x54R is like David Hasselhoff. It just won’t go away no matter how old it is.

    • ostiariusalpha

      Uh… Germans like David Hasselhoff.

      • Green Hell

        Catch phrase!

  • Joseph Goins

    .22LR is like Verne Troyer: fun to play with but too small to be considered a real caliber.

  • Joseph Goins

    9MM is like a micropenîs. It’s load isn’t going to penetrate much.

  • Keiichi

    300 BLK is like any movie starring Will Farrell… some people seem to think stupid can actually be quality entertainment. ;^)

  • Dr. Longfellow Buchenrad

    .300Blk is like Bruc… Carl… Um.. that Jenner…

    Because it started life as… well you know.

  • Keiichi

    .460 Rowland is like a pair of hemp shoes… hipsters love it.

    • Dr. Longfellow Buchenrad

      If only they could fit it in their Steyr

  • Keiichi

    6.5 Creedmoor is like the you that you imagine you were back in college… Sexier than the .308 Win you are now, but never saw nearly as much action.

  • AndyHasky

    I’m gonna guess 17 HMR was Paul Walker…

    • Ark

      Fast, furious, and died too young?

      • AndyHasky

        “because it’s fast, but underperforms against hard surfaces”

        • Keiichi

          Too soon…

          • AndyHasky

            I would assume that’s why they censored it…

  • Ark

    10mm took balls. Maybe don’t tell that one at the next NRA dinner.

    • Keiichi

      10mm is like Vin Diesel… surprisingly good at what it does, and not given nearly enough credit.

      • Joseph Goins

        That’s because it doesn’t live up to it’s potential anymore. They don’t make them like they used to.

        • Keiichi

          I don’t agree. Sure, there are many anemic 10mm loads out there, but there are many (near) full power loads available too. I’ve found and routinely shoot many of them through my G20 and MechTech carbine.

        • Anonymoose

          10mm was never as good as people remember it being.

          • B-Sabre

            Much like Vin Diesel.

  • billyoblivion

    Miley Cyrus didn’t die.


    • ostiariusalpha

      She’s dead to me.

  • 5.45×39 is like Vera Farmiga, because they’re both in their early 40s and belong in my room.

    • Joseph Goins


      • iksnilol

        ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

  • Brick

    .50AE is like Nic Cage. There’s a lot of fun in all the ridiculousness but at the end of the day you are left wondering if there’s any role that it can actually fill.

  • Don Ward

    That video was walking-away-from-and-explosion-without-looking-back levels of awesome.

  • DanGoodShot

    That 17 one was R U F F. HA! Why do I feel a little shame(?) that I understood every single one of those, including the “edited”. But I loved em all!! That was GREAT!! Any way to get the “unedited” version?? Please?!

    • Sunshine_Shooter

      Care to elaborate on the 5.45 = Trump one?

      • noob

        It’s smaller than the 7.62 but it can still kill somebody in times square and not lose any votes.

      • “Ballistician’s delight” or “used by the Russian army” I’m guessing.

    • noob

      17hmr is Princess Diana?

  • Anonymoose

    I wanted to hear the censored stuff. 🙁

  • Marcus D.

    .45 Colt is like John Wayne. 1) Long dead but still classic. 2) The first thing you think of when you think of westerns.

  • iksnilol

    Finally! People can see James like I do… alternatively; how high were y’all when coming up with this?

    • Dougscamo

      Let’s go with the former….James having an Iksnilol moment about Drew Brees…..

      • iksnilol

        I was thinking about the moment when he’s the sun in the Teletubbies segment.

  • Johnsmyname

    Helping make Russia great again?

  • Aidan

    James, I recommend a doctor that has a couch in their office. What do you do for an encore though?

  • The_Champ

    Haha that was great. Down with the censorship though, we’re all adults here, we can take it 🙂

  • Mmmtacos

    Obama tried to stop both because he thought Russians controlled them but in actuality it’s just what the people want.

  • InfidelCrusader

    That was hilarious! I was hoping .30-06 was going to make the list.

  • Vhyrus

    I’m guessing the censored name for 17 hmr was Paul Walker.

  • BrandonAKsALot

    The slow close up during the .308 was one of the greatest things I’ve ever witnessed and I’ve seen a grown man crying in his car in a parking lot while reading a book about plants.

    • James Reeves

      hahahaha awesome

      • BrandonAKsALot

        True story. His door was slightly open and he was sitting in the Kroger parking lot.