Its well established that I lament the continued fad of “tacticool”, but as much as I poke fun, the fad has a tendency to create some actually unique and interesting ideas (unlike the Tacti-Coozy).

However, I can say with absolute certainty and zero reservations that this Champagne Gun has gone too far and is decided “tacti-uncool” and fast approaching unmitigated buffoonery.

The Champagne Gun is a magnum-only sized champagne bottle holder resembling the Thompson SMG. It works with spouts or diffusers. Per the listing it is “completely harmless.”

The offerer touts three uses of the Champagne “Gun”

• Champagne Showers: 16 to 23 feet spray for 45 seconds.
• Champagne Service: An original accessory, elegant and exuberant to serve champagne
  Champagne Display: Beautiful and stylish decoration, to display any magnum of champagne on a bar or dining table, or can be use a a centerpiece

Sadly, none of those uses include “proving one is an absolute tool.”

The Champagne Gun is not for those on a beer budget. Offered at KingofSparklers.com, the gun is on “sale” for $459 from a MSRP of $499. The “gun” is available in Gold, Rose Gold, and Chrome.

I believe that General Thompson would disapprove of this one.